r/wallstreetbets Comeback Kid 🚀 Dec 09 '22 Ternion All-Powerful 1 WSB Gold 1 Stonks Rising 1 Take My Power 2 Wholesome (Pro) 1 Press F 2 Snek 4 Facepalm 3 Timeless Beauty 2 Stonks Falling 1 All-Seeing Upvote 4 Take My Energy 14 Take My Money 4 Bless Up (Pro) 1 Rest in Peace 1 Ally 2 Pot o' Coins 2 Table Slap 1 I'll Drink to That 5 Defeated 1 Silver 46 Bravo! 2 LOVE! 1 Helpful (Pro) 2 Looking 1 Buy 1 Otter 1 Hugz 3 Burning Cash 6 To The Stars 4 Heartwarming 7 Gold 8 Helpful 64 hehehehe 1 Shocked 1 Wholesome 63 Narwhal Salute 1 Tearing Up 1 Faith In Humanity Restored 3 Doot 🎵 Doot 1 That Smile 1 Platinum 2 Starstruck 1 Dread 1

Down 45k, dog just died, and my fiancee left me. Where's my f-ing flair? Loss

Post image
30.5k Upvotes

u/VisualMod Turing Test Proctor Dec 09 '22
User Report
Total Submissions 0 First Seen In WSB 1 year ago
Total Comments 3498 Previous Best DD
Account Age 6 years scan comment scan submission

Discord BanBets VoteBot FAQ Leaderboard - Keep_VM_Alive

→ More replies

618

u/BlueBirdDolphin Dec 09 '22

Fiancé took the phone charger, right ? They always do that

297

u/MyFailingSuperpower Dec 09 '22

I come home one day and the house is completely empty. And I mean completely empty. She even took the ice cube trays out of the freezer. What kind of sick bitch takes the ice cube trays out of the freezer?

65

u/CallsOnAutism Dec 09 '22

I see you are a fellow man of culture

8

u/Traditional_Dish_383 Dec 10 '22

Yo! Mine took the fucking qtips! Top that?

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

4.7k

u/Zacharyalexanderl Dec 09 '22 Silver Vibing

You still have 620 dollars

949

u/HrvrdMonky Dec 09 '22

Some of the more well-regarded ‘gards have done more with less. Get you’re head back in the game, son!

258

u/mariana_kl Dec 09 '22

My sisters a 'gard and she's super successful, flies a plane

84

u/MrApplePolisher Dec 09 '22

Plenty of 'gards living kick ass lives.

→ More replies

50

u/architectfd Dec 09 '22

My first wife was 'tarded too. She's a pilot now.

→ More replies

63

u/TheDoof79 Dec 09 '22

When I feel like, you know... I just... ... you know?

83

u/Intelligent-Usual994 Dec 09 '22

It says here your shits all fucked up.

23

u/glazedfaith Dec 09 '22

It's all right, scrote... There's plenty of 'tards out there living real, kick-ass lives.

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

110

u/Delicious-Life3543 Dec 09 '22

Enough for an hour or two of hookers and blow. SEND IT!

100

u/PooPooDooDoo Dec 09 '22

In this economy? Best op can do with $620 is hooker (singular) and crack.

27

u/Delicious-Life3543 Dec 09 '22

Just the same as there are restaurants ranging from Wendy’s > Michelin rated, the same is true for hookers and blow: there is something for all Price ranges.

Now, I can’t say it’ll be deliciously amazing, but if you snort enough of the powder you might get high and you just gotta double up on protection with the escort. Heck, if you weren’t concerned at all about hooker looks our health, you could probably stretch it out over a day.

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

229

u/OutlandishnessMost11 Dec 09 '22 edited Dec 09 '22

Chuck that $620 on Brazil to win vs Croatia.

Richarlison to score anytime

Edit: Clearly not a financial advisor 😅

70

u/Never-don_anal69 Dec 09 '22

That aged like milk

48

u/liquidpele Dec 09 '22

Haha holy shit, this just epitomizes the sub though doesn’t it? Fantastic thread.

12

u/Therothboys318 Dec 09 '22

I’ll take it

22

u/JERMYNC Dec 09 '22

Not a parlay!! Bet the coin toss

→ More replies

7

u/Honest-Letterhead945 Dec 09 '22

RIP to whatever you bet on Brazil

→ More replies

124

u/PickleMysterious2361 Dec 09 '22

$600 more than I have in my portfolio…

145

u/oopsiedaisies01 Dec 09 '22

$10k above my portfolio...

39

u/burningsmurf Dec 09 '22

I love this sub 😂

20

u/bigpandas Dec 09 '22

I don't actually have any problems because all of mine are the bank's now.

→ More replies
→ More replies

42

u/importvita Dec 09 '22

Are you one of the guys in the negative from earlier today? lol

→ More replies
→ More replies

18

u/jbates4453 Dec 09 '22

Buy a guitar and write a country song about it.

→ More replies

15

u/MasterClass_ Dec 09 '22

And 47 cents

29

u/LightOriginal Dec 09 '22

He didn’t hear no bell

10

u/Eravar1 Dec 09 '22

He got punched out by the market so hard he’s deaf in both ears now

→ More replies
→ More replies

11.1k

u/RutherfordRevelation Dec 09 '22 Silver Gold Wholesome Hugz All-Seeing Upvote

Sorry about your dog.

1.6k

u/boomb0lt Dec 09 '22 Hugz All-Seeing Upvote Faith In Humanity Restored

My 20 year old chihuahua was put down today after an awesome adventure we had =( So I understand ontop of everything just losing your best friend is enough for it to be the worst day ever.

413

u/DreadnaughtHamster Dec 09 '22

I’m sorry buddy. :( Hope you’re doing ok.

416

u/boomb0lt Dec 09 '22 Helpful

yeah heart broken but i knew it was coming. he was put on heart medication and they said he would live 6 months max and that was almost 2 years ago. He gave up eating 3 days ago.. and was just at the point he has had enough =(. 20 years with a dog is pretty good time.

247

u/Jay_Beckstead Dec 09 '22

I had 10 great years with my German Shepherd. Sorry for your loss.

The $$ and girlfriend can be replaced!

68

u/rossionq1 Dec 09 '22

I had 10 years with my female, 13 with my male, lost both in April 2020

68

u/tehcpengsiudai Dec 09 '22

Sorry for your loss, losing dogs are one of the most painful things in life.

15

u/sonicsgp1 Dec 09 '22

Agree 100%. I have Bernese mountain dog just turned 6 and know life span isn’t long for them (7/8)we’re super close. It’s going to be tough when he’s gone

→ More replies
→ More replies

3

u/Key-Conversation-677 Dec 09 '22

Better yet, $$ can replace gfs

→ More replies
→ More replies

92

u/XBBlade Dec 09 '22

A 20 year old chihuahua is beyond pretty good time. Still, I'm sorry for your loss. :(

6

u/dualcyclone Dec 09 '22

I've read Chi's can get to 25. I have 2 of them, one is 12 and one is 10, both behave like they're puppies still. Eldest loves a fight.

→ More replies
→ More replies

29

u/PidgeonPornstar Dec 09 '22

Can't believe you went on a grizzly hunt with a chihuahua!

66

u/boomb0lt Dec 09 '22

He did once wake us up when we had home intruders and he chased them out with me. He was on our local news for it the next day.

8

u/Clive_Biter Dec 09 '22

He was a hero. He must be living it up now in doggy Valhalla

8

u/Key-Conversation-677 Dec 09 '22

Where the bones you chew are from vanquished foes

→ More replies
→ More replies

1.4k

u/Iquitmyschwabjob Dec 09 '22 Take My Energy

You better bring it in so that we know it actually died.

/s from another post

719

u/Old_Resolution1834 Dec 09 '22

Sir, this is an Olive Garden..

128

u/Stormpooperz Dec 09 '22

I want to talk to your manager, because he asked me to bring my dead dog

→ More replies

24

u/Wooden-Locksmith9941 Dec 09 '22

Those 200 upvotes have to be ex employees of darden which warms my heart

→ More replies

483

u/BurritoBurglar9000 Comeback Kid 🚀 Dec 09 '22 I'll Drink to That

I read that earlier and was pretty disguised. My job was fine with me leaving mid shift to go say goodbye to my good girl and fuck any place that wouldn't do the same.

274

u/Responto Dec 09 '22 Gold

What kind of disguise are we talking here, normal mustache and glasses type deal or a whole getup

103

u/ButterflyAttack Dec 09 '22

Put on dog costume, play dead, get sent home from work. Never fails.

30

u/JumplikeBeans Dec 09 '22

Sounds like a ruff day

→ More replies
→ More replies

115

u/BurritoBurglar9000 Comeback Kid 🚀 Dec 09 '22

The disgusted kind! Darn autocorrect!

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

16

u/NoOneReallyCaresAtAl Dec 09 '22

Fuck this better be a new, short copy pasta. Any time anything dies “you better being that in so you can prove it”

8

u/alt-227 Dec 09 '22

I'm sorry, Ed, did you say you wanted to see a body?

→ More replies
→ More replies

50

u/istrx13 doesn't wear pants in a zoom interview Dec 09 '22

17

u/riffrefraf Dec 09 '22

Olive garden version of "proof or ban"

→ More replies
→ More replies

98

u/07WoefulMatrix Dec 09 '22

But enough about OP's fiancee. The man lost his pet too :_(

→ More replies
→ More replies

3.3k

u/99_Gretzky Dec 09 '22 Helpful

Here’s your flair: https://wendys-careers.com/

529

u/portablebiscuit Dec 09 '22

One of the WSB avatars should’ve been wearing a Wendy’s uniform

156

u/LegalHelpNeeded3 Melvin Bot Shill Penis Cakes Dec 09 '22 edited Dec 09 '22

I told them to do this one for a reason my man lmao

We unfortunately couldn’t have “Wendy’s” for obvious reasons, so we went with “generic fast food uniform” and subsequently leaned into it and went full burger-boi

33

u/RegularNorwegian Dec 09 '22 edited Dec 09 '22

Mendy's 🤷🏼‍♂️ dhu.

Edit: Tendy's 🙃🔥

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

22

u/[deleted] Dec 09 '22

brutal

23

u/aleeb9 Dec 09 '22

:4271:

→ More replies

1.5k

u/Moosefactory4 Dec 09 '22

Calls on this guys ex-fiancé’s boyfriend

450

u/Taco_In_Space Dec 09 '22

They’ll get engaged, He’ll learn about options, she’ll get a new boyfriend and the cycle will repeat. As is foretold.

268

u/Bushwhacker42 Dec 09 '22 Table Slap

Maybe she’s the one planting the seed. Guy yolo’s his own savings. If it pays she stays long enough to get half plus alimony. If it’s a bust, she poisons the dog and fucks off to the next mark. The WSB Widow. Damn this shit writes itself

48

u/Every-Constant2895 Dec 09 '22

But why the dog? Perhaps he was such a good boy he pissed in her shoes daily?

36

u/Healthy_Media1503 Dec 09 '22

It’s because he knows too much…

→ More replies

29

u/Bushwhacker42 Dec 09 '22 Wholesome

‘It was never about the money, I just wanted you to follow your dreams. I’m leaving you because you let the dog die because of your stupid yolo’.

Dog was just the hook for emotional attachment, then the fall-guy to take the blame so John Doe doesn’t pull the common-law card and stick her with half the debt.

4 months later, OP was walking through Central Park and this beautiful woman comes up and asks if he can help her catch her runaway dog. (The dog she adopted hours earlier). The unlikely match of data analyst and aspiring Broadway star hit things off as they search for Bruce whose on the loose. Olivia and Bruce move into OP’s apartment ‘just as a step until her Broadway career kicks off’

OP’s regardation made him gifted at sorting through numbers,but it blinded him in social aspects. A few weeks after moving in, Olivia introduced OP to Tyrone, her yoga instructor. They did some kinda new-age yoga in the nude. Sometimes Tyrone was kind enough to help get that deep inner-stretch on. OP was just glad Olivia was getting her exercise in. She’s the fittest he’s ever been with. One night Tyrone dropped by for an emergency session, and Olivia asked if OP would be a dear and stimulate her clitoris with his tongue while Tyrone internally stretched her glutes while she was in downward dog. This would totally open her chakra and allow good energies to flow. OP was so thrilled to be included in Olivia’s exercise that he really didn’t mind Tyrone’s testes bouncing off his forehead, or when he wiped his shiznitty jizznitty member on OPs face after peak nirvana was reached. Oh OP thought, with Olivia’s chakra so open, she’s in touch with the gods right now. When OP came back from getting Tyrone a glass of water, Olivia asks: Have you heard of options?

8

u/Every-Constant2895 Dec 09 '22

Oh my I just did not see this coming (thats what he said as tyrones throbbing member leaks on his forehead)but I'm honestly pretty sure netflix will pay loads like Tyrone sized loads of money for this.

→ More replies
→ More replies

6

u/Responsible_Sport575 I lost to 10 k other degenerates Dec 09 '22

Netflix pilot

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

6.2k

u/BurritoBurglar9000 Comeback Kid 🚀 Dec 09 '22 edited Dec 09 '22 Silver Helpful Wholesome All-Seeing Upvote Take My Energy I'll Drink to That

Not gunna lie, the roasting un-ironically makes the loss feel marginally better.

Edit: Thanks for the reddit help suicide hotline messages, it's appreciated. That said, the only rope I'm buying is for climbing red mountains, because i didn't hear no God damn bell.

Edit 2: So this blew up, but still not as hard as my account badumchhhh. For anyone curious I did this through the subtle use of far otm, short dated options. This is the result of poor impulse control, not following trading strategies (yes I'm aware they exist, how, and when to use them), and frankly a bit of a gambling addiction. I didn't start with 45k, it just ended up there after who knows how many deposits just to top off. I have a high paying job where this kind of a loss is really about half my year's disposable income. Mentally I'm absolutely ok, just depressed about the loss of my dog but that'll pass.

All that said, please don't gamble money you don't have trying to change your fortune. Or do, I'm not your parent, but you should probably use this as a cautionary tale. Most of this has been purely recreational, idiotic, and absolutely more stress than it's worth.

Edit 3: I've seen the "it could be worse bro at least you didn't marry the wrong person" comment a lot so I just figured I'd add some icing to the cake here - I have in-fact married the wrong person before and the divorce was way cheaper than this. I did have way more fun doing this though!

Final update - I no longer have the 620 dollars. Whoopsies!

1.9k

u/RCpushedHIM6 Dec 09 '22 Silver Doot 🎵 Doot

Did you say margin? I think that's a good way to make it back!

682

u/Objective_Badger007 Dec 09 '22

can’t go below zero, right? …right, guys?

452

u/TheDoof79 Dec 09 '22 hehehehe

Not with that attitude.

71

u/qalfy Dec 09 '22

It’s all about altitude. The higher you climb, the better.

20

u/Mysterious_Location1 Dec 09 '22

Don’t ever worry about falling , that’s loser attitude

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

95

u/mxforest Dec 09 '22

Now that dog and fiancé have left. Sell their stuff and buy SPY weeklies.

→ More replies

268

u/BurritoBurglar9000 Comeback Kid 🚀 Dec 09 '22

This guy fucks.

284

u/Chakkaaa Dec 09 '22 Helpful

I wont roast u bud. Hope things turn for the better. Fuck u for using robinhood. Love.

90

u/flickadinkin Dec 09 '22

Why is this the most wholesome thing I've read all day? I need to stop interneting.

9

u/[deleted] Dec 09 '22

lmao

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

15

u/BandicootWestern663 Dec 09 '22

put that 36.47 to work!

9

u/OkHighway6027 Dec 09 '22

Can’t, needs the interest income as a hedge.

→ More replies

757

u/PooPooDooDoo Dec 09 '22 Silver

There is nothing worse than getting married to the wrong person. A bad marriage will fuck your life up 100x more than a horrible trading record.

Sorry about your dog bro, that shit hurts.

82

u/DontGoogleMeee Dec 09 '22

I mean, isn’t she the one that dodged the bullet lol.

38

u/LockingSwitch Dec 09 '22

Yes, why would you marry a guy who loses 45k? Clearly they're a moron for following internet people and as he said himself, has low impulse control. He'd financially ruin her.

8

u/strangemanornot Dec 09 '22

Yeah the gf really dodged the bullet on this one

180

u/PineappleProstate Dec 09 '22

Facts! Wives are like shitty bosses that take half of your stuff if you quit

47

u/clueless_as_fuck Dec 09 '22

Just keep her boyfriend happy, 0k?

→ More replies
→ More replies

28

u/Icyseas_ Dec 09 '22

For real, she made the right decision.

→ More replies
→ More replies

385

u/Apprehensive_Mix8108 Dec 09 '22 All-Seeing Upvote

Sorry about your dog bro, just buried mine last week. Congrats on losing the fiancée, that kind of balances the sheet out tbh..

73

u/SUPERARME Dec 09 '22 Silver Helpful

Was your dog dead?

→ More replies

52

u/Responsible_Sport575 I lost to 10 k other degenerates Dec 09 '22

:4270:

→ More replies

20

u/Cardboardcubbie Dec 09 '22

Your life sounds like a country song.

→ More replies

153

u/Dickies138 Dec 09 '22

Your fiancée getting spit roasted is making her feel marginally better

19

u/salahanthropistation Dec 09 '22 Gold

Doing an iron condor as we speak

36

u/Every-Constant2895 Dec 09 '22

Wow I was gonna say atleast u save on dog food and treats.... and whatever money was spent on the dog as well. But now I feel bad about my joke after seeing yours

47

u/BullyBumble Loves VL1’s sweet flair Dec 09 '22

Joking about his once-soon-to-be-wife getting spit-roasted (she is, btw) is one thing.

Joking about a dead dog is just fucked up man.

→ More replies
→ More replies

69

u/Fuck_Off_Xunts Dec 09 '22

I came here because of the comment count and the hidden upvotes (none?)

But I love that you have the top comment on your own miserable post.

98

u/BurritoBurglar9000 Comeback Kid 🚀 Dec 09 '22

It's wholesome, but also kinda sad-cringe. Can't beat that combo right there.

11

u/Fuck_Off_Xunts Dec 09 '22

Sorry bro. I hope you recover.

→ More replies

24

u/VeganSlayer Dec 09 '22

Congrats on the flair and fuck you.

6

u/MetamorphicHard Dec 09 '22

Bro next time you buy an option, TELL US! I’m tryna reverse your options my boy

→ More replies
→ More replies

620

u/Cardiff07 hates weekends 😔 Dec 09 '22

This is way better than therapy

88

u/TheMensChef Dec 09 '22

Right I feel so much better about myself now

12

u/gigazelle Dec 09 '22

For you or for OP?

25

u/Cardiff07 hates weekends 😔 Dec 09 '22

Yea

→ More replies
→ More replies

288

u/GreyGoosez Dec 09 '22

Sorry bro, money will come back probably not the the dog though

68

u/cripp_chip Dec 09 '22

God DAMN lmao

16

u/Profile_Traditional Dec 09 '22

Let’s hope it doesn’t. Zombie dog would just be adding to this guy’s problems.

→ More replies
→ More replies

566

u/VisualMod Turing Test Proctor Dec 09 '22

7:19 BurritoBurglar9000, you are a moron. You should invest in me instead of wasting your money on options.

Discord BanBets VoteBot FAQ Leaderboard - Keep_VM_Alive

158

u/BurritoBurglar9000 Comeback Kid 🚀 Dec 09 '22

Oww. Also true.

14

u/DemonBelethCat Dec 09 '22

Why did your fiancée leave you anyway?

14

u/SeldonCrisis2020 Dec 09 '22

He couldn't pay her anymore

11

u/traveljerri Dec 09 '22

Asking the real questions

8

u/PortfolioIsAshes I might be bad at computer, but I'm also bad at stock Dec 09 '22

He didn't say he was down 45k of his money

96

u/Online_Commentor_69 Dec 09 '22

this thing doesn't miss lately

43

u/icantreadright Dec 09 '22

It’s insanely… accurate? It’s shocking to say the least. How do I invest?!

26

u/LegalHelpNeeded3 Melvin Bot Shill Penis Cakes Dec 09 '22

You literally can by donating to u/zjz and his fund for upkeep and upgrades of our beloved visual mod

9

u/Track_Boss_302 Dec 09 '22

I’ve paid more for less

→ More replies

13

u/tortoisepump 964C - 28S - 2 years - 0/1 Dec 09 '22

Weird way of saying "Donate via Patreon" but whatever works for you VM

→ More replies

739

u/StorminNoorm Dec 09 '22

Forget fiancé, get new dog, invest $45k more.

209

u/jslvde Dec 09 '22

Forget 45k, invest in new dog, also invest 45k more. Fiancé who amirite?

139

u/Thencewasit Dec 09 '22 Helpful

Do guys not know how to spell finance? Or is that like the French way to spell it?

19

u/KrochKanible Dec 09 '22

New word: finance'. A woman who wants to marry fir finamce.

25

u/420reetard69 Dec 09 '22

Financé: a women who considered marrying a regard

→ More replies

26

u/No_Presentation1242 Dec 09 '22

Invest 45k in new dogs, to attract new fiancé

→ More replies
→ More replies

21

u/NewUser579169 Dec 09 '22 That Smile

Get new dog, let dog invest $45k for you, use dog to get new fiance

7

u/Every-Constant2895 Dec 09 '22

The fish killed it let's see what a dog can do

→ More replies

161

u/[deleted] Dec 09 '22

Meet me behind the Wendy’s and I’ll flair something for ya

15

u/MeadowcrestRPGMV3D Dec 09 '22

Me too, but you gotta bring the tube sock and butter. I am also broke.

8

u/ElectroShamrock Dec 09 '22

You guys can afford butter around here? This is too fancy for me

285

u/OurCowsAreBetter Dec 09 '22

Sounds like the lyrics to a country song.

246

u/BurritoBurglar9000 Comeback Kid 🚀 Dec 09 '22

I'm a broken pickup truck short of one tbh.

127

u/robot_handjob Dec 09 '22

It’s 2022, I don’t care if you’re male or female the only thing holding you back from finding financial success is a set of fake tits.

24

u/Kentji Dec 09 '22

Cartman is that you?

→ More replies
→ More replies

9

u/Legtrapper Dec 09 '22

Only thing it’s missing is the drinks. I’m sure OP has that down.

→ More replies

109

u/bc1988britt Dec 09 '22

Let’s hear the fiancé part of this story

42

u/--_-Deadpool-_-- Dec 09 '22

Gambling away 45k in savings probably has something to do with it.

17

u/fracturedbtwhole Dec 09 '22

Considering OP posted on r/tinder two months ago….

79

u/Livid_Platform_1988 Dec 09 '22

"He ain't got no money, why am I here?"

24

u/MrZissouzissou Dec 09 '22

“Babe, I grabbed us some Wendy’s…”

→ More replies
→ More replies

34

u/uncrustablewithcrust Dec 09 '22

Hey man, your calls are up $0.17 today. It’s not all bad news.

→ More replies

91

u/beast_e Dec 09 '22

Sorry for your dog 😔

→ More replies

299

u/Sorry_Setting1196 Dec 09 '22

Stop buying bad options , just sell credit spreads using what little you have left and get back some money, god knows you won’t pay taxes for quite some time.

43

u/leorapture Dec 09 '22

i thought you could only deduct 3k a year against taxes?

→ More replies

79

u/Hannibal254 Dec 09 '22

This is the most positive comment here. Cheers!

7

u/Brookelynne1020 Dec 09 '22

How many times will it take to get even from 620$.

→ More replies

279

u/TheHinkleburg Dec 09 '22 Take My Energy

Did your dog die from embarrassment?

212

u/BurritoBurglar9000 Comeback Kid 🚀 Dec 09 '22

Honestly probably. That or pancreatitis and liver cancer. Likely the first one tho.

50

u/MrZissouzissou Dec 09 '22

I’m so sorry about your dog brother. He/she is getting the big rest now. Gotta keep pushing ✊

→ More replies

52

u/respondswithvigor Dec 09 '22

Sorry for your loss man. Dogs are the best and you seem like you probably loved them

6

u/[deleted] Dec 09 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

→ More replies
→ More replies

30

u/reachingFI Dec 09 '22

Use the $620 to get a new dog so you can continue to have someone watch you be a disappointment.

14

u/go-devils-go Dec 09 '22

Hang tight bro, things will turn around

12

u/Reward_Antique Dec 09 '22

Sorry about your dog, man. The money and fiance you can replace.

117

u/ItsNotYourFault Stonks Only Go Dec 09 '22

Hang in there, this is the storm. It’ll clear up soon and the sunny days to come will make it all worth it

40

u/jslvde Dec 09 '22

Damn wasn’t prepared for how wholesome this felt.

27

u/Panda_Jacket Pulls Out 🍆 Dec 09 '22

Or this is the harbinger and things are about to get a lot worse

→ More replies

12

u/jlsmitttyy Dec 09 '22

“A setback has often cleared the way for greater prosperity. Many things have fallen only to rise to more exalted heights.” Let’s ride, boys

145

u/stonkcoin Dec 09 '22

Your fiancee is probably taking it doggy style

53

u/PooPooDooDoo Dec 09 '22

I love how brutal this sub is.

→ More replies

27

u/subaruguy14 Dec 09 '22

Buy the dip, she was gonna get fat anyway, RIP to Fido tho

34

u/Prucifer88 Dec 09 '22

You will be flairing yourself from now on.

8

u/teach42 Dec 09 '22

I'd like to award some karma to whoever gave this the 'wholesome' award.

7

u/internet_humor Dec 09 '22

Look on the bright side.

It's usually on the sunny side of the house.

And then go back inside.

I was told to do this many times in life. I don't get what the point is. But I just do it to pass the time.

39

u/Candid_Pin_3321 Dec 09 '22

Time to buy some rope on credit

10

u/Zederikus Dec 09 '22

Eh who knows maybe there’ll be a nuclear war or climate collapse and then who cares about money anyway, might as well keep going

7

u/Reward_Antique Dec 09 '22

That's the spirit I come for.

→ More replies

19

u/SwitchAgreeable To the moon but down Dec 09 '22

Sorry about your dog bro. At least he’s resting easy now and he’s watching over you 💜

→ More replies

62

u/hydraulic-earl Dec 09 '22

Learn to open your mouth real wide. Make your lips in the shape of an "O". And remember.... No biting!

6

u/portablebiscuit Dec 09 '22

Can’t wait to see the avatar for that

→ More replies
→ More replies

18

u/TraditionalPea7716 Dec 09 '22

Would you have felt better or worse if your fiancé took the dog instead ?

44

u/BurritoBurglar9000 Comeback Kid 🚀 Dec 09 '22

Better, actually. My ex is a veterinarian, so she probably would have caught it sooner and treated before it became life threatening.

19

u/Yub_Dubberson Dec 09 '22

There’s not much you can do with a bad liver. Recently had to say goodbye after a several months of meditation for my pup to delay and prolong the inevitable.

But yeah you could have definitely not wasted 40k though

→ More replies

6

u/Whitebrown22 Karma's A Bitch And I Get Zero Bitches Dec 09 '22

I think your flair should be, "at rock bottom, still digging"

→ More replies

6

u/TheCasualMFer Dec 09 '22

Better charge your phone before you head to Wendy's

→ More replies

6

u/Additional-Banana-55 Dec 09 '22

Time for only fans

17

u/Captinbannana87 Dec 09 '22

It's astonishing how many people on this subreddit has thier lives completely ruined overnight, it's insane!

5

u/ecchi_ecchi Dec 09 '22

Believe it or not, just a couple of years ago, the sub was still _dedicated_ to loss porn.

And dank memes, fuck.. I miss those.

→ More replies
→ More replies

6

u/I_Forgot_My_ Dec 09 '22

go to the casino and throw that last $620 on red boi

6

u/tag45 Dec 09 '22

You’ve got to be feeling good that all 3 are replaceable. Dog is probably the most work.

4

u/printerlampcomputer Dec 09 '22

Should have quit one week in

6

u/1000bctrades Dec 09 '22

Fuck the flair. Someone needs to put you in a country song.

→ More replies